As of Monday, I am 36 weeks pregnant. Officially 9 months .... 4 weeks to go. And really.... I'm feeling pretty good. Of course, I have the normal pregnancy aches and pains -- my back hurts quite frequently, I can't sit or stand for a long period of time, my bladder is being used as a punching bag, Jacob likes to crowd my lungs making it hard to breathe, he kicks my ribs and my spleen and sometimes hits a nerve in my hip that literally makes me lose all feeling and strength in my leg, sending me crumbling to the ground (which is very painful and awfully funny all at the same time). Ahhhh.... the wonderful joys of pregnancy!! :) But that's all normal stuff and overall ... I'm doing really well. Despite all the things that come with having a little human stuffed in my belly --- I absolutly love feeling him inside there. I can't believe that soon it'll all be over and another stage will start. I've hardly gained that much weight and am really thankful that I won't have too much to lose after he comes. Today, I had my last ultrasound and everything is GREAT! He's weighing about 5 pounds - which is right on target. They think he'll be in the 6-7 pound range when he's born. So that's good (no 10 pound babies for me..thank you very much)! His head is down and heartrate is strong. Everything is healthy! Praise God for a healthy baby. I know it's a cliche' but really, that's all I want--for him to be healthy. I don't care how he comes out (natural, c-section...whatever). I don't care when he comes out (now that we're in the home stretch). I just want him out and healthy. I know several people who have had premature or very sick babies and have heard story after story of all they have to go through. It breaks my heart. I constantly remind myself that we are not our own. Rylee and Jacob have only be entrusted to Darrin and myself. They are not really "ours" - they are God's and are here for His purpose -whatever that is and however long He chooses to keep them on this earth to do it. It's His will that matters, not our own. He's graciously blessed us with them and it's our respondsibility to raise them in the Lord. And what a blessing that is! Not always easy (somtimes, I can't wait for the day's end...and it's only noon!) but a blessing nonetheless. I know that 2 babies will be a double challenge at times ... but I also know that it will be double the blessing. God has provided this little miracle to us at this time - and I know He'll provide the strength and confidence needed to figure out how to deal with them both!
But for now, I'm trying to enjoy these last few weeks being a mommy of just one and a family of just three. I'm trying to slow things down among this season of hustle and bustle. I just want to enjoy this time, rest and get ready for ths new chapter we're about to start. Soon, Darrin and I will have to divide our time and our attention -I know that we'll look back at these past 18 months and think "what did we ever do with just one??" I know that it'll feel like lightyears away and we won't even be able to imagine Jacob not being in our lives. But for this small window of time - we're cherishing it all and thanking God for each second, each laugh and yes, even each tantrum. :)
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